Mickey Mouse Wins Presidency In Shocking Turn of Events

WASHINGTON,DC- In a shocking turn of events, Mickey Mouse, the famous Disney character who has appeared in such films as Fantasia and Mickey Mouse Clubhouse: Mickey's Treat, received enough write-in votes to win the presidency of the United States of America early Wednesday morning.


"This is a truly shocking day in U.S. history," CNN political analyst Wolf Blitzer said. "I think I speak for everyone when I say that we did not see this coming."




Mouse will be the first-ever animated president in U.S. history, as well as the first non-human in the Oval Office. His wife and fellow mouse, Minnie, will succeed Laura Bush as first lady. When informed of the improbable win today, Mickey, who received 51% of the vote, said, "Oh boy! Really? Hot dog! C'mon, Pluto! Let's go!"




Many political analysts had expected Sen. Barack Obama (D-IL) to win because of his large lead in some pre-election polls. The polls, however, did not take into account the strong affect that write-in votes can have on an election. "We tried to make our polls as accurate as possible," Blitzer said. "Unfortunately, we just didn't think of America's most famous cartoon character . Don't underestimate Mickey."




Cartoon characters around the world are hailing the results. Fellow Disney character and friend Donald Duck said, "Oh boy! Good job, Mickey!" Goofy, another friend of Mouse's, also congratulated him. But it was not only his Disney colleagues who celebrated with him. Kermit the Frog, who can be seen in the Muppets movies, claimed, "This is truly a great day." The Smurfs sang, "Mickey-ee-ee-ey! Mickey-ey Mouse!" Scooby-Doo had this to say: "Rickey Rouse? Ralright! Gro, Rickey! Roohoo!" And Spongebob Squarepants, who lives in a pineapple under the sea, exclaimed, "Alright Mickeyyy! Woo-hoo! Go Mickey! Go Mickey! Go Mickey!"




Sen. John McCain (R-AZ) and Obama, although disappointed, accepted the defeat with grace. "If you're gonna lose to someone, lose to Mickey Mouse, right?" McCain commented.




"I can honestly say I did not see this happening," Obama said. "My opponent (McCain) and I would, I'm sure, love to congratulate him. But why didn't I think of running an attack ad on his relationship with the 101 Dalmatians? Or how his appearance and character have changed throughout the years? Darn it!"




Obama finished second in the polls, at 30%. McCain received 18% of the vote, while other candidates, such as Jesus, Uncle Sam, Fidel Castro, 'your mom', and Ralph Nader comprised 1%.